In the midst of trial ...

appears those that you least expect to help out.

While my main support system did fail, I can't let it pass that I did get help from unsuspecting people.

Lea was busy Fri night, and i know she's up really early for work, so I admit, I didn't think to call her even though she's in the neighborhood. She was heading to bed, she went to close her browser and saw my FB plea for help, and sent me the text saying she had to change back into clothes and was on her way.

Kate saw my frustration on twitter Sat that my friend didn't go get my meds as promised, so she added me to her list of errands, did my shopping, banking and med run for me. Seriously folks, she was an angel, we had only met IRL once before at my garage sale. She has the cutest kids, I gladly kept them here so she could get a little time alone also.

My boyfriend Eric and his daughter came over on Sunday to spend a few hours before he drove her home and had to head North, he just started a new job and is working almost 50 hrs a week.

A former neighbor came by with a surprise Christmas food drop for me. 5 bags of groceries and a Turkey. Humbled and blessed.

My friend Jake dropped by w/ a fantastic Christmas CD for me, and has called daily even though he's getting ready for his band's first music video shoot this weekend.

My ex even offered to drive down 3 hours to spend time helping if I needed, yet none of the "close friends" that have been here through all of this, were able to be here for me.

So while it was frustrating, there were major bright lights from unexpected places, and they weren't trains! I am blessed, I am humbled that people I barely know would go out of their way to help me out. It's times like these that really show you where we need to prune. Thank you Lord for being so blunt!

Prayers & Pictures from the recent past

Yes, I said I would be better at Blogging, today I will catch you up on my life.



First and foremost, I ask that you pray for my friend Morgan and her family. She’s a 7 yr old ball of fire and today she is going her 11th cardiac surgery. Morgans long story is found on her CaringBridge site. While it was updated in February w/ great news, Morgan began a rapid decline soon afterwards. She has a big brother and a little sister, and tons of friends are supporting their family through this.

Now on to the random photos of the past few months …

Remember when I was so sick in February?


I did manage to sneak go out for one night of fun with friends.
A great friend of mine is Jacob Merlin and he has one of the BEST bands in Portland, soon to be hitting up Seattle and Tacoma! I manage his Merchandise for him as well as his Blog (which we just started). This is just some of the fun from that night.




 




Michael is his guitarist. Talk about TALENT!











Oh, while I was sick in February, Abigail broke her foot. Yeah, THAT was (not) fun!












Tim insisted on taking me out for a date night, it was Applebees. We discovered that after 9pm they sell Jello Shots made in orange peels!  He couldn’t resist. While I was tired, it was fun and a needed break.








We needed to get Abigail out of the house … what do you do w/ a kid in a wheelchair?












You go BOWLING! David wheeled her up to the ramp and she let the ball roll down!


This is a special place for us as Mark and I bowled league here for years and later on, Mark and David bowled here together.





What’s the saying? March arrives like a Lion and leaves like a Lamb?
Well for me it arrived w/ Shingles! (there are more pictures on that post if you want to see them)










Easter arrived any my girlfriend Katie and I decided to make chocolate covered Rice Krispie Easter Eggs. It was a ton of fun.







…. well there is quite a bit more to add, but that’s for tomorrow…

Stressed

Going through a very difficult walk right now. Can't go into details, but I am praying very hard for someone's heart to be softened and mind to be open to change. I'm also praying that I get through this without another bout of shingles. It's something that I have to deal with and wish I didn't.

Will you pray for me?

I'm speechless...

2 weeks ago, while in the parent support group at The Dougy Center, I spoke of our financial difficulties due to my recent medical issues. I brought it up because it's affecting me in a big way, I had spent over $500 on my health issues and an additional $250 on replacing the alternator on my truck. All vital expenses for my family.

After group, S. walked up to me, dug into her pocket and handed me money. I was in shock and asked "are you sure", her response was "I've been there, I know what it's like, I have it now so take it, you need it". That $100 was like a million for me because it's what I needed to pay the power bill the next day.

Friday afternoon, my neighbor came over w/ a pot of homemade soup and corn muffins so that Tim didn't have to cook for us. I was incredibly sick and it was perfect. We appreciated it so much.

Tonight, because of my having shingles, I was unable to attend group at the Dougy Center. Tim took David and left with specific instructions to let the group know why I wasn't there and to tell S. THANK YOU again for me. As the groups ended, he walked in to get David and spoke to S, and noticed one of the fathers, A, in the group walk up to David and hand him an envelope for me. They just got home and handed it to me. I opened it to find $300 in it.  I am in tears. I will pay at least one bill off.

I've known these people for the better part of 2 years because we lost a partner, we share a story, we are part of a club that no married parent wants to join.

We all have our struggles, I did not say what I said hoping that they would "bail me out". I had no expectation of that at all.

I am simply overwhelmed by their generosity and only hope that I can come up with some way to thank them for what they have given David and I.

I am humbled.

They continue to give me Hope and Faith in the people that surround me.

Monday update

I have fingers and toes again! Well, I never really lost them, I just couldn't recognize them because of the allergic reaction to the Keflex. What a week it's been! The swelling in my face is but a distant memory now, my face and scalp tingle all the time now, it's extremely annoying. I just returned from the Ophthalmologist, the verdict is that my eye(ball) is swollen and irritated, but not infected. This is GREAT news, I have eye drops to use for 2 weeks and unless I have problems, I'm good to go. So, I'm going to take my anti-viral, percocet and benadryl and return to bed.

Thanks for your continued prayers, I truly appreciate them.

Thursday update ...

What a morning, I woke up to my feet feeling like the first time that you walk barefoot on cement, that tender pain feeling ... yeah, well my feet were beet red and swollen as were my hands. So ... called the doctor to let her know that and that my rash had spread.

Went to see her and she said to head to the ER ... 


Diagnosis... I have shingles. Tim is off getting my meds from 2 different pharmacies (Percocet and an anti-viral). I can't be around you if you are pregnant, haven't had chicken pox, haven't had the immunization, are immuno-suppressed, have cancer or a transplant or waiting for a transplant amongst other things ... so I can't go to Church or Tim's HS Reunion that is this weekend

I will be seeing an Ophthalmologist Monday to be sure that my eye is not infected or at risk, because this is surrounding my eye there is a serious risk to my eye. If my eye worsens at all I was told to get to the ER right away.

While I'm relieved it's not MRSA as first thought, I am not loving that I have "chicken pox" at this stage in life ... nor am I happy that I now have one less antibiotic that I can take, the ER Doc said "you're running out of meds we can give you". He's serious, I am!


I honestly don't know when I'll be posting regularly. The percocet is going to knock me out, I'm also allowed to take Benadryl for the allergic reaction. I will be sleeping a lot for the next week or so. My house is a mess :( More so than usual, and it's really bothering me. 

And so it continues

Just when I thought I was done being sick, I woke up Sunday with a red spot in my left eyebrow near the top of my nose. Figured it was a zit coming in, I am 45 after all, I still get zits ... ugh. I didn't really think much of it.

 

Monday I woke up looking like this. I know, annoying, but not the end of the world. Benadryl and sleep, hot pack here and there. It will go away, right?

Apparently not, Tuesday arrived and I looked like this! My lymph node under my left ear is swollen and hard, very painful to touch. You can see it sticking out. I'm not a happy momma. I'm taking Benadryl and sleeping again. 

Yeah, it's looking pretty bad isn't it? I know ... I called the doctor and left a message. She's out of the office on Tuesdays.

Which brings us to today, Wednesday. My eyelid is swollen and I feel like a character from Star Trek.

I've gone to the Doctor. She has cultured it (48 hrs for results), taken blood to check my white blood cell count (it's fine) and has me taking Cephalexin.  If I don't see a noticeable difference by Friday morning I am to call her. She will then call the local Emergency Room and order IV antibiotics for me. Her concern is that I may have contracted MRSA (basically staph that is resistant to antibiotics) while fighting my sinus infection.

So I'm washing my hands, taking my meds, I will be hot packing and taking Benadryl to help w/ the itching. I'll keep you updated as I progress. Of course we're supposed to be going to a Class Reunion out of town this weekend, it never fails.

My days are measured by pain and pressure ....

Yesterday was horrible. I woke w/ the worst headache I've had in recent memory. I wanted someone to take a table saw and remove the top left quadrant of my skull to help prevent the impending explosion. Of course we all know that would allow it to escape and be rather messy. So I dosed myself up w/ my meds and back to bed I went. I swear I've never slept as much as I have this month. I had the door open for fresh air, the humidifier going and the Olympics on the TV ...

Last night I woke to eat and return to bed. The headache had subsided but the pressure in my face was tremendous from the sinus infection. Oh ... and the snot!?! Where the heck does it all come from?

Before I went back to bed, I spent time w/ my kiddo. He was in his darkened room, reading by the light of his Salt Rock Lamp. Reading? Yup ... and I couldn't have been prouder, it was his Bible and he was looking for the story of David and Goliath. He told me that he's having a tough time with some kids at school and (no joke) "needed some inspiration on how to stand up to them". WOW!!! Color me blown away.

...and this brings me to today, Friday ... just another day in me being sick. No headache today, just lots of pressure under my right eye and in the right side of my face. We're supposed to go away for the weekend, kiddo is going to his cousins house whether or not we go, I may just pack a quick bag for myself later since the gathering we're attending is across the other side of the City. I can come back tomorrow if needed.

Have a great weekend .. .I've so much to share when I am back to regular blogging.

Not bad ..

...I've only lost 2 followers in the past 4 weeks.

I am so sorry that I haven't been here to keep you amused. I am now on a round of Zithromax. I have a second round of Prednisone to take after that IF my breathing hasn't improved. I also have the other meds that I take daily ... that would be Pulmicort 2x daily for Asthma (drop to 1x day when I'm back under control), Zoloft 1x day for depression OMGOSH I SAID THAT HERE?? Heck yeah, I battle it, I live w/ it ... it is a part of me. I also take 1000 mg Vit C daily, 2000 iu of Vit D daily, a multivitamin, Tessalon for my cough (which will go away when it's gone) and then my emergency inhaler Albuterol, that I take 2-3 x daily now until my Asthma is back under control. Add to that what I've already been on this month (Prednisone, Amoxicillin, Codeine) and you can understand why I'm not blogging much. I'm sleeping a LOT and coughing even more. It's not pretty.

So, my hope is that next week I will feel substantially better and be in a place where I feel like writing more. My life isn't that exciting, it's absolutely chaotic lol even though I've been sick ... did I mention that my step-daughter broke her foot? Or that I wrote a note to my sons Assistant Principal asking him to have a convo w/ him because he's been late to school 2x this week ... oh yeah ... it's been fun! It never ends in the House of Chaos.

If I posted a picture...

of myself right now, you'd see me curled up on my side, screeching and wheezing when I cough. Yup, that's me. I have coughed so much that my lower back is in spasm and has very little strength. My shoulders and other back muscles are sore and tender.

The Lord is forcing me to pay attention to myself, obviously I wasn't doing it well enough on my own. I'm a slow learner at somethings...

Asthma...

sucks the life out of me at times, and this is one of those times ... thought I'd let you know why I haven't posted, been struggling almost 2 weeks w/ this and a sinus infection (the latter triggered the asthma). I've been under some stress, that's not helping. I will post soon about all of it.

Less than pleased...

Abigail was sent to us sick. Very sick.
Her Mom came down sick on Sunday, very sick.
Abigail went home Sunday night.
Tim woke up sick.
Abigail and her mom went to the doctor today.
Abigail has the Flu and rec'd the vax because she has Downs Syndrome and a heart condition.
Abigail's mom has H1N1.
There is an approx 40% False Negative on the H1N1 detection test (according to my Nurse neighbor who just came back from a major training on it).

Leads me to believe we've ALL been exposed to H1N1 and are on our way down. I started coughing this afternoon. I have never been one to use Purell and Lysol wipes, but I'm heading to the store right now.

I am less than pleased w/ the Ex-wife. She gets pissed at us if we bring Abigail home and "expose her daycare" to anything, but never has an issue with sending her to us sick without telling us first.

Loose ends ...

That's what this week has been ... lots of loose ends that I have tied up ... so here goes:

• Trevor is still missing. 
• Cale is about to give birth ... she happens to be Trevor's older sister, can you IMAGINE the conflicted emotions their mom is dealing with this week?
• I am officially a Consultant with Scentsy, Inc. now ~ the Company sells wickless candles that are simply fantastic! You can shop online here ... https://marissaphillips.scentsy.us/Home 
• I met with David's teachers, Counselor and Principal yesterday morning to discuss "where he's been and where I want him to go" stuff ... new school, teachers that don't know that he chews his own fingernails down to nothing and that's a sign of high anxiety ~ you know, those kinds of details ... 
• I rejoiced on Wednesday when our Social Security was deposited, it meant I could buy some Honey Nut Cheerios for David to eat for breakfast ... and replenish the milk, and eggs, and pay the electric bill etc ... yeah, those kinds of details
• I thoroughly cleaned and organized the main floor of the house. NO small feat I might add. This place was bad, I admit it, I love the way it feels in here now. Do you want to buy an entertainment center? No .. Seriously, I need to sell it... yes, I do. 
• Did I mention that my King and I went to see the Oregon Symphony Orchestra Saturday night? No? I didn't ?? Well I'll have to get that written this weekend ... and you'll get the King's review of it also .. yes you will.

So there it is ... a busy week, I'm tired, but feel very accomplished, oh ... and I think I'm allergic to Sulfates so I'm making some major changes here, I started w/ a new Sulfate Free Toothpaste today that costs thousands of dollars per tube (not really but it IS an expensive switch) and I'm amazed, my mouth doesn't have the tingly feeling I've grown used to ... hmmmm .... I think that's a good thing. 

Sulfite Allergies

Stick with me here ... I was out w/ a group of friends tonight, and one was talking to me about my hair and how long it's grown and how thick it is. I told her that I want to cut it again because it bothers my neck really bad, gives me rashes. She asked what hair care products I use and when I told her, she said "I think you have a Sulfite allergy" and I kind of brushed it aside but made a mental note of it. I had one alcoholic drink, chips and salsa and lots of water. As the night progressed I noticed that as we were laughing and talking, I was coughing more, which typically happens as winter sets in and my asthma starts to kick in. I have also had an ongoing "rash" on my back and chest that the doctors have not been able to identify nor 100% effectively treat .... Ok, so I come home a little while ago, head to google and enter Sulfite Allergy and OMFLIPPINGOSH the first site I click on describes the last umpteen years of my health problems with eerie accuracy! Migraines, rashes, hives, asthma, diarrhea, low energy, foggy brain... It's ME! No wonder my neck itches when my hair is longer, I'm reacting to my hair products (Yes Gwen ~ we just had this conversation), if I hadn't had this conversation w/ Lisa tonight I would NOT have discovered this. 


Ok ... so here's my question ... if you are familiar with this type of allergy, what substitutions have you found effective? I obvious have to make changes as soon as I can. Fortunately, based on all the research I did tonight, I do not eat a lot of the foods that are triggers, but please include any you may use. (and yes, I will be talking to my doctor and pharmacist about this because different meds contain Sulfites as a compounding agent)

and again...

my body is fighting something off. I don't know why I'm struggling so much my health, but I need to take care of myself.

I will try to get some posts pre-written for you guys, just be patient, and if you are the praying type, add me to your prayer list please.

Peri-Menopause / Menopause products

There are so many "products" on the market to help us women with the nasties we all go through. You know what I mean, the night sweats (who doesn't love waking up between sheets that are soaking wet in the middle of the night), the mood swings, the hot flashes, the changing skin sensitivities...the list goes on and on for those dealing with peri-menopause and menopause. It's such an exhausting time of life for most.


My King saw an infomercial for a product called Gems Keep it cool the other day, I received a text saying TURN ON CHANNEL 12, and I too had a chance to see it. Marie Osmond is promoting it and by all appearances, it looks like it's worth a try ... so I wanted to see if anyone that is stopping by here has had any experience with this product.

One day ...

I won't be sick and I will get a real blog post up for you guys to read. I just don't have the energy nor ability to focus on anything much other than sleeping, getting warm, cooling down, cool rags, hot water bottles and drinking fluids w/ tylenol (when needed). I can't have the Flu forever ... right?

still here ...

...just been taking care of myself and my family

temperatures this week over 100* for 4 days straight

dog is going stir crazy, can't get out to run

concrete is approx 130*

street approx 155* (not hot enough to fry an egg...we tried)

house w/ ac is between 76* and 80*

add to that

• Migraine headache
• ears that are ringing
• dizziness
• low tolerance for extreme temps...

and you can see why you haven't seen hide nor hair of me the week.

Please keep Stellan and the entire MckFamily in your prayers. While the immediate urgent crisis of this weekend has calmed to some degree, he is still a baby in crisis.

Sitting quietly...

on the couch,
trying hard not to use my right arm
my rotator cuff is injured
not sure how severe
I just know it really hurts
and has been since i took that fall last year

so now i sit
I have an mri and xrays on it tomorrow
it's hard to keep it still, i am right handed after all

but right now
i get to watch Tim and Clark reset the TV/DVR/DVD players
it's amusing
as they grunt
and groan
and curse under their breath
trying to make Marks system work

it's amusing
and i imagine he's laughing his ass off watching these two work
'cause he's just that way