Monday, January 12, 2009

Outta control

Right now, I'm in a dark place. Not so dark that I can't see a way out, I know that's there and how to get to it, but I have got to work hard to get there. I'm not doing well in school, right now, it's too overwhelming, yet I don't want to give up and quit, for that's what I've always done. My friend Tami says that Satan is playing w/ my brain, and not to let him win, I laughed it off, but honestly Tami, you were right.

I've placed a call to the Counselor that David and I worked with after Mark died. I don't know that she is the one for me to continue with but I am confident that she will guide me in the right direction. I may have to work w/ her husband (because of his credentials) from time to time as I think I'll need a medication adjustment, who knows.

Anyway, I wanted to let you guys know what's up and such ... life is good, really it is. I have been blessed with Tim coming into my life, Tami can tell you that (when she gets back here). He truly loves David and I, in fact, he's going to start training TODAY for the 15K Run on the day David and I are doing the Fitness Walk!! Says he promised to get in shape and wants to follow through on that promise to us. Doesn't want to be a husband that won't keep his word.

Ok, I've now wasted another day, I start a new class tonight, with a tough but fun professor. He taught one of our courses a couple sessions ago, and I'm still not done w/ that work ... see my issue here! ARGH!! I just can't get myself together. To say "my house isn't in order" is a complete understatement ... I'm allowing myself to exist in complete turmoil.
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